My Family Gives Me NO BREAKS

I was really sad so I called my dad. I started to cry as soon as I heard his voice.

Pops: Hello?

Me: *sniffles* Hi Daddy…

Pops: Is this my daughter? Crying? Oh gosh. I’m gonna look at this menu. Here, talk to your Uncle Bill.

Uncle Bill: Hey, Jess. Watcha doin’?

Me: *sniffles more* Crying like-like-like a little b-b-b-bitch.

Uncle Bill: Sounds like it. You okay or are you just having a womanly moment? ‘Bout damned time you started to have those…

I actually feel a lot better now that I’ve spoken with my family.

Pops is down in Florida because my grandmother’s husband passed away on Friday. Friday was also my Uncle Bill’s birthday. Cowabunga.

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