I went grocery shopping with my buddy Matt. He’s the best. He drives me around everywhere and makes sure I don’t go crazy when living alone. I’m a social person and need social contact.
I really like Fuji apples; they’re the first things I buy when I go to the super market. I’d have to say they’re my favorite fruit, but as luck would have it, an elderly man was restocking the apples, large cart blocking my fucking fruit of choice.
I decided to wait instead of roaming the produce sections; I was gonna have my pick of the litter once the old one had moved on. I got antsy and struck up a conversation:
Me: How are you?
Old Guy: I’m fine. Yourself?
Me: I’m grocery shopping, and it’s pretty much the highlight of my week.
Old Guy: Oh, that’s sad.
Whatever, man. It’s the little things. I have a bag of sweet apples and I’m happier than a pig in shit.
I will know I’ve found “the one” when he gives me a pack of hair ties, lip balm, and a bag of apples.
Like I said, it’s the little things.