I left my earbuds in my apartment before I went to class. Big. Fucking. Mistake.
I heard everything.
Listen, that’s nothing. I haven’t had sex in nine months.
THAT’S A REALLY LONG TIME! ARE YOU EVEN TRYING MAN?!
I’m going to remodel her shithole.
I started to laugh really hard when I heard this one… mostly because they were two gangly-looking, pasty-skinned dudes. Eh, I shouldn’t judge. He could be packing heat.
I am back in my apartment to pick up my beloved neon orange hearing devices so I can go for a run and be a fit bitch. It’s one thing to listen to people chat, quite another to hear people pant, grunt, and groan.