I, like just about every other Asian person, like karaoke.
For my father’s 50th birthday, my family and all of the people at his office had Korean BBQ and went to a karaoke joint.
I got hammered on Seoul Trains (think sake bombs only with beer that tastes like baby piss that’s been vomitted back up and mixed with a synthetic rice wine). And then I picked up the microphone and said, “This one’s for you, Pops!” and sang Madonna’s “Papa Don’t Preach.” I was a god…in my head.
But the social massacre of Jessica didn’t end there. I stood up and said, “AND THIS ONE’S FOR MEEEEEE!” …and sang “Like a Virgin.” My mama ripped the mic out of my hands; my dad high fived me.
Mum thinks I drank water for the rest of the night. It was really 소주 in a water bottle, courtesy of my father’s employees.